To Catch a Falling Leaf

Halloween weekend…was so excited to dress as a cat, Cat Woman to be exact. I had waited all year to sport her perky ears, full of fun tail, carefully penned whiskers, and false eyelashes more dramatic than they needed to be and yet exactly as they needed to be. And with great anticipation, I dressed early as to not be late and to not rush readying. But in a last minute decision after dropping off my son at his Halloween Party, the blue sky, white clouds to my left, called me instead East to hike, leaving the soiree contently in the West.

I decided to hike Rattlesnake Ledge, a familiar trail for me – today called for the friend of familiarity – having trekked it’s trail dozens of times. On this day, breaking my personal best up the mountain was not the goal…and yet it happened as its way on its own. Pain is a powerful fuel.

But a funny thing happened on this particular day on this not in particular trail. I was met with more “Hi”’s and “Hello”’s than ever on my frequented trail over years. At first it was intrusive to my sought solace, intent to arrive for my awaiting soul nourishment at the summit. But gradually, my spirit softened with each sincerely shared smile and lightness of being with each traveler’s greeting. It even slowed my step and a pause for conversation on the bridge with someone who’s eyes locked with mine as…I caught a falling leaf.

“Wow,  that was cool!”, she said. “That was,” I agreed as I held the most delicate leaf that literally fell into my open hand that was in gesture to her climb, her being a newby and needing encouragement to continue up with her companioning pack. There were trees, sure, all around, from where the leaf could have come, but none appeared close enough to be within reason of it falling exactly, and in that moment, into my palm. It was damp. Maybe from earlier rain, maybe also from it holding still some of its life before decaying in the next day or so, meeting its demise. No matter it's reason, I was grateful for it - for it's  mystery and for it's moisture, calling me out of my singular mission, bringing me into its instead. A message, if unknown, but clear.

I chose to carry the leaf the rest of the way of the two thirds left of my up. It was soft in my holding too tight hand. It was not yet ready to crinkle into pieces of itself. I loosened my grip and let it feel safe to be whole for its while.

“Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.” ~ Albert Camus

When I reached the summit I felt myself unconsciously breathe a deep, deeper than I can remember ever, breath of the air’s crispness, before finding a spot, my spot, near the mountain's edge. “You made it”, a man, who I may have on an ordinary day found attractive, but on this day had eyes not open to things of such nature, said giving me a high-five…clearly unknowing that I’d made it to the top of that spot a couple dozen times. I smiled. He complimented my sunglasses. I tried to look busy with digging into my bag for my pen and paper.  "Good", I said inside, I am certain, when he went down slope. Solitude was again mine to find.

 

Until, “Ahhhhh it is beautiful. You were right. The view was worth it.” The girl from the bridge from below, greeting me on the rock. Even though aloneness was my intended trajectory, I was happy to see her eyes a’sparkle at her determination that she seemed eager to have me share in, her crew a step behind, all who started to engage with me – clearly ignoring my “Can’t you see I want to be left be,” signs with my writing and book in hand. There were five of them. “Are you a writer?” one of the guys asked. “I am”, I forced a cordial reply – how mannnny times have I been up there at that spot with writing journal, laptop, paper in hand and have never had that asked yet this time, no writing journal in my impromptu hike on this day, and no laptop to giveaway that I was a writer. What.was.happening today!

Forty minutes later a closerness was formed with these had been strangers and I, as they wanted to hear about my stories and…my story…and in turn was equally interested in theirs. We finished off with a handshake and she asked if they could keep in touch. They were delightful young, vibrant twenty-something year olds with so much love for life in their eyes and hope still evident in that beautifully naïve way that is youth’s to hold. I was happy to have them broken me from my spell of retreat and was happier to take photos for them, to capture and memorialize their aliveness in the magic that is 2,000 feet up.

 Several more encounters like this happened. Including a conversation of hilarity as a guy called me out on hiking in leather pants. He was all too kind to laugh with me as I explained the diverted choice of paths - from comic book feline'ing to dirt walking instead - and we shared laughs as he said that I should have just worn the entire costume up rather than leaving half of it in my car down way. I no longer remembered that I wanted to be alone on this day. He made me forget that was my goal.

 The final now welcome interruption, as clearly soloing it was not the Universe’s intention despite it being mine,  was a filmmaker and his partner, a photographer and writer. Unfolding now, this day, was a day of inspiration and for a collective share of creative energy. These two TOO approached me - how from my scratch paper on the backside of a concert ticket and makeshift desk on a small book they could know, “Are you a writer?” And the conversation weaving grew, again, from there.

Sunset happened to us on the hilltop, shadows fell now behind us, in spirit and in structure, as the film guy said, “Now I know why I was up here today later than we had planned to arrive – to meet you. I am newer to Seattle, only a year, and had yet to have met my tribe. And here you are.” In that moment I felt a peace, different than the one I had first set out to find on my random fork in the day’s agenda. But one better all the more.

With the sun setting at my back, I ran the entire two mile descent, not because I wanted to rush, not like my hike up. I had no reason within calling me to expedite my down -  that all had dissipated in the calm of the thin air, and the unifying of energy, miles up. No, I ran because I wanted to feel, in my lightness of step, the rush of the movement against my face that comes only in the not walking under foot. A confirmation of all that is still alive in my Fall.

Today…each of these people, were catching me…a falling leaf. The heaviness of my head was held by each stranger who sought, and drew out, connection to me on that significant day of all ones. And in sharing of our stories, our hopes, our goals, passions, dreams and desires, we were engaging in the way of Autumn -  a time of renewal and reflection and a season of rebirth and of resonance in its stillness that is not that of Spring or Summer mountain-walking. The leaf knows it, as it falls with some hope for survival still in it as its stored nutrients can last it a day or so.

That day I sketched fewer words than anticipated, but none meant as much as my ones written, “Today I caught a falling leaf.” Today I caught a falling leaf, softening its to below and carrying it to feel sun on a peak if for just giving it a little life longer. “Today I caught a falling leaf. And we were both better for it.”

{I.Am.Here}

- A girl who knows where she's a go'n - May 2009

As I sit here feeling the sun on my face through my office building window, I am reminded of a day around this time four years ago – seeing sun shining through my living room bay window onto the ragged remains of cotton pages in the middle of my writing journal. Frayed, because – 60 (2-sided) pages were GONE! Ripped out by my then husband, ripping nearly my guts and hopes with them. But “nearly” was enough to...get me HERE. Where is here?  Here is…a few writing sessions away from putting the soul rushing “FADE OUT” at the end of my third, yes THIRD, screenplay (as well as re-write and edits to a friend’s book). 

 

~ Stories to be told.  Me age 4 ~

To some maybe that doesn’t seem a lot, but when you are a full-time working, commuting, single mom, trust me, it’s more than a lot! And so “here”? Here...is the evidence of my unbreakable spirit. Here…is belief in dreams, those that wake me in the night screaming to be heard and those whispered in the silence as I feel the lake trail under my feet and the breeze on my face telling me “believe”. That day of discovery of the secretive heist by my now ex-husband -- removing the pages in a sneaked moment when I got into the shower, he went into the guest room (of our “up for sale” house) that I’d moved into while we finalized our end, and he...destroyed with cruel intention, shredding a year’s worth of work. Irreplaceable words and thoughts – lost. FOREVER. Four screenplays of notes and 48 out of 56 lines of a stage play…GONE! I was vomitish, literally, for weeks. Could barely eat or sleep. And it evoked in me a feeling that I didn’t even know existed. It. Was. The ultimate act of selfishness.  I moved out that very day and never looked back.
 

- Couldn't FADE me OUT! - January 2013

It took me four months before I could even touch my writing journal again. And it took me another few to find the strength within me to even attempt to put my stories down on paper again. But my stories -- thank you stories! -- they gave me the courage to write again. I bought a new writing journal, with new energy and a fresh start. That was four years ago, and three screenplays just about behind me, there aren’t words for the elation that comes from that kind of victory. He destroyed my never to be recovered words. He tore pieces of my soul with each paper shred. And cut me deeper than any of his other elicit shenanigans. But I got up, stood taller and looked defeat in the eye – I won that staring contest! I run my fingers every now and then over the pages of pain on my old journal. I kept it, retrieving it actually from the trash that I tossed it into (a few times), knowing that I needed to keep it. IT needed me to keep it.

 

And so HERE? Here, is...HOPE. COURAGE. WILL. PASSION. And BELIEF. It is also HONORING my inner voice who was always loud enough even in its stillness to be heard through the chaos. Grateful. Here…is GRATEFUL. And it is also FIFTEEN original Ryan Roxley stories in the works.

 

I do hope to be privileged with the gift of time at some point, so that I can crank them out sooner than one a year. For now, my office will continue to be…at the lake, on the bus, in the waiting room, on the beach, in my bed, in my oval tub, on my back patio, or my front porch, at the tree swing, at the airport, at Tanner's football practices and at coffee shops any(every)where…in my stolen moments of “free” (ha) time ‘tween 11 ¾ hour work/commute days and trying to write only when my son is active in something other than our time or when he’s at his dad’s house.

~ {peace} ~

 

Speaking of, there may come a time where I can’t lie anymore when my son asks me, “Mom, did you ever find out who that evil man was who stole your writing?” For now, I will keep walk on the high road and just enjoy the sun on my face in a moment of breathed in peace at {HERE}. - RyRox

Boulevard of Broken Beauty Product Dreams

I have heard this comment often enough now that I figured it was time that I give credit to the items in my daily lineup -- in addition to other things of good nature that I (have learned to) do -- to answer the why for the "You have such great skin!" (THANK YOU btw for the compliments!  Makes a 41 year old very happy) and to share my "secrets" (been asked)...and let you in on my arsenal of good skin health. 

Likely...you've been disappointed repeatedly with promised effects of the latest cosmetics counter hard sell, letdown by the barrage of infomercial kits, cornered by your well-meaning neighbor insisting you buy the newest craze (which they are now selling) or cheated by the evidential airbrushing in the latest beauty mag.  Me TOO! 
If I were to line-up all the products that I've tossed through the years of items that were barely worth the bottle they came in, I'd end up, well, right back in Seattle, full-circled the earth, seriously!  Not to mention the neatly tucked in a box in the back of my bathroom closet stuff that was too expensive to just throw away!

As a previous sunworshipping teen, it became evident when my first wrinkle appeared that any old lotion just wasn't gonna do.  So I spent a lot of time, and as mentioned m$ney -- LOTS of money -- researching anti-aging ingredients and narrowed my field of test to only products containing those *.  Once identified, my quest took another fork...WHICH to buy, of the gazillion options. (Oh the madness!)  So,  naturally, expensive meant better, right?  Hmmm...in theory...it made sense to me at the time.  And so I started using products that, no joke, were upwards of $100 per OUNCE!  Did they work?  Well, they were better than my drug store product of the week or my hotel sample lotions.  But with multiple areas to address -- toner, serum, moisturizer...day AND night each having their own moisturizer and then add treatment items (wrinkles, scars, redness, dry, oily, patchy.....) -- and then different ones for eyes of each of those, not to mention special face scrub to prep the skin...UNCLE!  At $100+ each...it was not sustainable and when in 2009 I became a single mom...on a budget, it became even more imperative to sort out my search.  I took it as a personal challenge to find the BEST ingrediented products butttt for the FAIREST price.  GOOD NEWS!  I have found some GREAT products that actually DO as they say (go figure!).  And that is why I felt inclined to post this (finally)...to help you too find really great skin care that won't cause you to have to choose between eating or glowing skin.

*Warning* -- Don't be alarmed at the number of products I use.  You don't have to use all in order to see change and progress.  Feel free to email me and I can provide you a list of "bare minimum" suggested items.  And even though it may look like a lot, these products are such high quality, that they each have their own benefit (yet also work together)...where other similar lines lump them all into one bottle, but their potency's are diluted which is why you don't see the results you so wish for and thus another frustrated waste of your hard earned money and your time.  And Men, healthy skin is attractive on you too...and I can suggest an easy 3-steps for you that will help slow your frow brow. ;D

The primary line I use is Baby Face as well as Olay and Skinn.  I have included the links to each product so that you can read in more detail what each is best known for and their full spectrum of ingredients and target areas.  I'll start in order of my daily/weekly routine: 

Morning

• WASH with Olay Regenerist Cream Cleanser (why just wash your skin, when you can exfoliate, treat and nourish it at the same time!)
• TREAT with Baby Face Treatment Booster (contains some of the highest levels of age fighting "magic", Argireline and Matrixyl)
• HYDRATE with Baby Face Massive Hydration (LOVE this stuff!  Addicting...in a good way ;))
• REGENERATE with Baby Face Peptide Potion (for anyone over 30, highly recommend!)
• MOISTURIZE with Baby Face Mega Lift Moisturizer (Luxury for a fraction -- compares to products $150 an oz.)
• PLUMP lips with Skinn Amplifying Serum...now before you get all screech in your heels on me, this is NOT yo mama's lip plumper.  To say this stuff is a m a z i n g is an understatement!  It WILL replace ANY chapstick, lip pots, other plumpers you may have.  Trust me  TRUST ME!  It soothes, smooths and softens.  This product does not faux plump or sting.  It actually works to increase your own collagen.  You will not have what I call "nectarine" lips (the lines like on a nectarine seed :)) if you use this product.  You need very little and please do rub it in around your lips for those age lines that rudely arrive and to give you the most kissable lips ever. 

Night

All the same as above with the exception of replacing the (day) moisturizer above with:

• TREAT with Baby Face Super-C Serum. Fantastic for those stubborn forehead lines and those equally uninvited creases around your eyes.

• MOISTURIZE with Baby Face Night Renewal Retinol Cream (strongest Retinol you can buy without a prescription!)

And legs, can't forget legs (and body) nourishment.  I use every night before bed (I usually shower after the gym which is at night):

• DRENCH with Neutrogena Butter Cream Body Cream.  Smells delish and the best I've found for the softest of soft skin. 

Tidbit:  I do use all of my Baby Face items on my eyes as well, to save on money.  They do offer eye specific items, but the ones listed here are perfectly fine for eyes (which is not always the case with other skincare brands) and have the powerhouse ingredients to transform even your eye lines.  However, if you are looking for a great eye specific product, check-out Baby Face's Eye Cream containing the most advanced ingredients including Haloxyl (as used in top selling eye creams in the range of $100-200 per ounce!)

Weekly

I'm a freak for facials!  If I could afford to get one every few weeks...I would, so would!  Mostly because of the massage...but also for that *fresh* youthful glow :)  But since I can't get them as often as I'd like, a home facial is my next best friend.  I use weekly:

• MICRODERMABRASION using Baby Face Express Facial with Dead Sea Black Mud.
• OXYGENATE with Baby Face Blueberry Mask (a POW of antioxidants for your skin)

I'm going to give an additional plug to Baby Face.  Not only are their products fab, but their customer service, delivery and s/h prices are gold star!  So pleased in every way with them.  And note, you'll get really good reading material with each product, for you research junkies like me.  They have gone to great lengths to note why the products are stellar.  High-five Baby Face www.babyfacestore.com.  You can check out their full line of products on their website. 

 

And a showing of how awesome they are...they are offering a coupon for you for 10% off your order, use code THANKYOU10 in the check-out.  You can also find insider info on their Facebook Page. Would love to hear your own Baby Face line feedback. 

With all my praises of Baby Face you'd think I was a paid endorser of theirs.  Nope, just a very satisfied and repeat customer.  I get nothing more than the same 10% off my order.  I'm just happy to spread the info...and save YOU too some time AND money!  Buy some hot heels with the money I saved you. ;D

Note:  I do use a clairisonic type brush a few times a week with my face scrub...for additional, deeper cleansing and exfoliating, but it's not necessary.  Just an added element for skin regeneration. 

Lastly, there is a non-skin related item I should mention.  I HATE hairspray, but the good lord cursed me with hair that needs it most of the time.  And the only thing I hate more than hairspray...is hairspray smell!  So, I guinea pig'd myself yet again for the cause and took products to task for a) touchability, b) lastability and c) smellability...and the winner...hands down Soy Touchable Hair Spray.  The smell is intoxicating...but blends well with perfumes -- NOTE that! ;)  If you can imagine real life scene of me in the beauty supply store, smelling over forty hairsprays -- all for us mad-as-hell victims of broken beauty product dreams. 

So that's it.  There you have it...my regimen and recipe for loving your skin.  I've been asked to show my ID to prove my age to a co-worker who refused to believe I was 40 (in 2011).  Freak'n BEST compliment e-vuh!  Do *I* think I look younger than my age...I have no idea.  What does 41 look like these days?  My 11 year old son (when I was 40) said I only looked 37 haha!  Whether I do or do not look my age, the greater concern is...is my skin healthy?  And according to my dermatologist -- yes, yes it is.  Is it good genes?  Maybe.  But it's also GREAT skin care, a regular skin care routine, and it is also taking care of myself with what I put INto my body, lots of water, nutrition, as well as what I put ON my body/skin.  Is good skin care world peace?  Clearly not -- nor as important as, but certainly no downside to looking your best and aging gracefully.  What I hope this post gives you though, and my entire purpose of sharing it, is insight that you don't have to shop like RICH folk to get RICH rewards (and hopefully save you frustration of products that fail).  Will I go to sleep lathered in these products and wake-up looking like Megan Fox, Magic 8 Ball says "Don't Count on It".  Will they help me (and you) look more refreshed and less lined...YES! 

~Happy nourishing~

Sincerely,
RyRox
ryanroxley@yahoo.com

*Key skincare ingredients: Argireline for firming (botox alternative), Matrixyl for wrinkles, Hyularonic Acid for plumping, Vitamin C for antioxidant and repair and the all important Retinol for renewal.  The products I use have these advanced and proven ingredients...all of which are for the benefit of increasing and stimulating your skin's own collagen production which is the nemesis of aging.  TAKE THAT WRINKLES!

It Started With a Toaster...It Ended With a Toaster

Relationships are hard.  Marriage is harder...and BOTH are worth the effort.  Love is always worth the effort.  So why then do things seem to turn so nasty during a break-up and even worse during a divorce?  Where did the love go?  Where did the kindness go?  Where did mutual respect go?  Where did even common sense go?  Recently going through a divorce it was so troubling for me to see that, 14 years of marriage, 16 years together, came down to a conversation of "things", specifically the division of things.  Though I knew this conversation was inevitable, I was taken by surprise at how disturbing of an experience it would prove to be.  As we sat in the dining room of our now up-for-sale home, discussing and listing items for our 50/50 "valuables and assets" split, I knew we were in trouble when we were only on item #7 out of 42 and the only thing we had agreed on is that we didn't agree on anything!  It went something like this:

"BBQ." Me. 
"Well I get that for sure." Him.
"Well why, if you are taking the boat?" Me. 
"Because we bought the BBQ for me." Him. 
"Ok, then I'll take the camping stuff instead." Me. 

"But you gave me the camping stove for my birthday and it goes with all the other camping stuff (he really said this, as if random camping stuff is a "matched" set...WHATEV)." Him. 

"Ok, you can have the camping stuff and I'll take the fire pit." Me. 
"Well that's not fair." Him. 
"How is that not fair?" Me. 

"Well...you can't even move it by yourself anyway (it's a huge brick and granite thing)." Him. 

"I'll figure that out.  I'd like to have the fire pit." Me. 
"Well if you get the fire pit then I get the brown patio furniture and the hammock with the hammock stand and you can have the green patio furniture." Him. 
"Why?  The green patio furniture is old!" Me.

And so it continued like this, on and on, getting nowhere.  At the end of items 1-7, I got one item!  An old patio set.  Then item #8, a toaster:
 

"I want the toaster." Him (CLEAR by now that, not only did he WANT everything, but he somehow felt entitled to everything...I guess as payback for me leaving him). 

"Well, I just bought that toaster, picked it out specifically because it could toast bagels and also an oven below.  I'd really like to keep it since I bought it." Me. 
"Oh, so I guess you think you get everything in the kitchen?!" Him. 
"Um, no, just the toaster..." Me. 

I then realized how completely hideous and oddly hysterical it was that we were negotiating over a toaster.  A TOASTER!  A toaster, ironically in fact, was the first item we ever bought together 14 years earlier...and now, here we were, bartering over one.  I stepped back, and his blood boiling in true "him" fashion, I said:

"How about you just go down the list and put an "x" next to all the things you feel strongly that you want and I'll just take the rest."  Me. 

I was DONE!  I'm a lover not a fighter - not to be mistaken for being weak, that I am not.  Some things are worth the energy to fight for...others are not.  My son Tanner was worth fighting for.  And so, it was in that "toaster" moment that I realized how little, truly, "things" reeeeaaaaalllly matter.  Sure, things are nice.  Really nice.  Everyone knows I love me some shoes, and furnishings given that I was an interior design major in college.  But when the "things" in your life start to overrule the "people" in your life, and start to cloud your better judgment, then it's time to cut the binding ties of things and get back to the basics.  Back to what is really important and ultimately fulfilling...and it is NOT in a Nordstrom shopping bag or in a leather chaise.  So I walked away, said goodbye to about 95% of all our things (and about 99.99999% of our assets value)...and I have never been happier!  Sitting in an empty house in our new place, just me and my son Tanner, some artwork, a piano, a queen mattress, a bed I picked up for Tanner on Craigslist one day before, and two of our four dogs, I was, strangely, inexplicably, at peace.  There are not words to express the amazingness of that moment.  White walls.  White mattress.  White comforter.  White sheets.  White pillows.  Pure peace.  Soul changing peace.  Looking around my new room with bare walls, bare windows, no bed-frame yet and thinking back to the beautiful leather and walnut sleigh-bed that I had bought only a year ago that I admittedly broken-heartedly, gave-in to letting him keep...I have never been more satisfied with just a mattress on the floor and have NEVER felt more at home. 

Since then, slowly, each paycheck I have started to rebuild, replace, reinvest in things and my absolute appreciation of each of these newly acquired things is a BONUS lesson.  I will say that it has been surprising how expensive it is to replace a houseful of items (especially 14 years of stuff)...towels, bedding, dishes, silverware, blender, broom, mop, kitchen utensils, knives, cheese grater, can opener, blankets, trash cans, a couch, curtains for every room, DVD player, bookcases...the list goes on and on.  Additionally, have you ever tried to replace a pantry and a fridge of food - ain't cheap (spices, syrup, condiments, plus all the perishables, etc. adds up quickly).  I actually took pictures of the pantry and the fridge after our first shopping trip, $400 later, the pantry and fridge were still pretty empty, but that moment symbolized a new start, a fresh start and I wanted to remember it forever.  I remember making my original list after moving in of the things above that I needed to buy and feeling very overwhelmed, but then reflected back to the first few nights that my son Tanner and I spent in a nearly empty room with just a mattress, a comforter and two pillows with music playing...and the peace, oh the peace!  There is a freedom that comes from that kind of peace.  I am so deeply grateful for this lesson in my life.  The first thing I purchased on my first shopping trip?  Yep, you guessed it, a toaster...and toast never tasted so good.

Pink Fever!

There is something special, almost magical, that happens each year in the Northwest that alerts me that Spring has sprung, even if the calendar shows otherwise and that is, the turning of muted hues of chocolate and evergreen to a fluffy shade of cotton-candy pink - known as the birth of the cherry blossom.  It happens, it seems, literally overnight!  I go to bed to familiar landscape of stick-like trees against the steamy riverbank and then BAM, while catching some zzzz's, a new morning view as I drive down my hill past a perfectly rowed lane of cherry blossom trees...and it is magnificent!

I love these romantic trees so much that, just as a baby bird in flight is called home by her mother, I am summoned back each Spring to visit UW (University of Washington - GO DAWGS) campus, as the sight of the quad in it's pink-blossomed frenzy is spectacular and gives me some kind of warm 'n fuzzy. 

Once there, I am always inspired by the glimpse of the UW men's rowing team, appropriately bundled in turtlenecked Under Armor and knit caps, gliding seemingly effortlessly through slight, somehow enticing, fog across glossy Lake Washington.  And am always surprised at my curious appeal of aged red-bricked buildings and stone walkways amongst shady lawns, and how they seem to scream out an invitation to "COME SIT FOR AWHILE!" and I just must accept. 

Then, almost as sneakily as those pink-poms appeared, they are gone.  Shades of lime and kelly appear in their place, barely noticing the previously baby-pink fleurettes now withered, deep magenta, smashed droplings on the ground.  Until, in the glory that is singularly Mother Nature, I am enchanted once again in a years turn of the calendar.

OPERATION: Free the Fleece...and Your Little Dog's Fleece Too

IN SUPPORT OF MY mission to prevent Snuggie world domination, I am offering a contest, an incentive of sorts, to free the world of Snuggie takeover, one Snuggie at a time. 

Two ways to play.  Here's how...

- $50 to the winner's charity of choice AND a $20 iTunes gift card for the winner of "The Most Creative Use Of" award for the person who most creatively re-purposes their Snuggie.  Winner will be chosen by vote (stay-tuned for voting entries soon).

- $20 iTunes gift card to a person chosen by random drawing from a pool of those who send me a photo and/or receipt as proof that you donated your Snuggie to a retirement or convalescent home.

Only two rules 1) Deadline for entries is midnight, March 31st and 2) HAVE FUN!  Winners will be announced on April 1st.

                                       

Why Operation FTF, you ask?  Simple.  I am driven by three external motivating factors and by three internal motivating factors...

EXTERNAL: 1) A lady on the bus was talking about personalizing Snuggies for each of her family members, with removable/re-usable different holiday decals throughout the year , 2) Last night I saw a lady using her Snuggie IN the movie theater, and 3) I never want to see a photo again of a family of four in their Snuggies on Super Bowl Sunday!

INTERNAL:  1) 5.6% because I find their commercials to be the most condescending and ridiculous attempt to appeal to smart people - a family of Snuggie wearers in the bleachers, for real?, 2) 2.6% because I LOVE blankets.  REAL blankets.  Cozy, soft, squishy blankets for snuggling or watching TV/movies.  Not blankets incognito, in a version that is essentially just a thin, fleece (definition: polyester made by reacting terephthalic acid, a petroleum derivative, with ethylene glycol, another petroleum derivative, commonly known as antifreeze), choir robe.  And who cares about the whole hands-free argument, I don't.  They look ridiculous, however you try to spin it, and 3) 91.8% because...I INVENTED the same darn thing when I was 10!  So, I'm jealous (there I said it), that I'm not the one raking in the dough, laughing all the way to the bank, while counting my Benjamin's from my third story St. Lucia vacation home balcony. 

FAQ's:

Q:  Do I have to be present to win?
A:  No, you only need be alive at the time of the announcement.

Q:  What if I don't use iTunes?
A:  No problem, I'll gladly substitute for another gift card of your choice (except for Walmart).

Q:  Can I enter more than once?
A:  YES, please do.  The more you help the cause, the better.  And each Snuggie entered is an additional entry into the drawing.

Q:  Do I have to be your Facebook friend to win?
A:  No, please spread the word.  If you have friends/family members/random strangers that you would like to share the contest with, please do.  Again, the more the merrier.  My email is with_honors_@yahoo.com and can also be found on my Facebook profile.

Q:  Is this a real contest or have you just lost your mind?
A:  Both!

Q:  Were you dropped on your head as a little girl?
A:  Yes, I think so...several times.

Q:  What if I have a Snuggie knock-off, does that qualify?

A:  YES. Take a "before" and "after" photo and that will work just fine.

Let the FUN begin!

Shiny Happy People

VOGUE.  PEOPLE.  COSMO(POLITAN).  You name the mag, they've got 'em - page after page of "Shiny Happy People".  I'll be the first to admit, I get sucked in and can't wait to get my "pretty people" fix.  Yahoo's omg! is my first place I go when I jump on the net, to flip through the latest celeb event digital photo albums.  But as much as I love the visual stimulation of those overglossed, underdressed shots, I have realized that my love for them is left there, on the page and on the screen.  Fantasy is not my fulfillment.  In the spirit of the poem known as "The Statue of Liberty" poem, the inpsiring famous words, "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free..." I say, "Give me your authentic, your honest, raw self.  Bring me all of who you are, ragged edges and all."  And so shall I.  Because THAT's what friendships and true connections are made of.  Behind the celeb's shiny, "happy", porcelain-veneered smiles and orchestrated press-line photos, are people.  Just like me.  Just like you.  And so, though I do appreciate the creative expression of an adorned body, the artistry of a masterfully make-up'd face, and crave the visual fireworks from perusing the pages of the newest fashion issue on the newstand, they are just that, an exhibition of beauty...not the substance of what is beautiful.  And I am reminded - beautiful on the outside means nothing if you are ugly on the inside...and beautiful on the inside can go a long way to compensate for ugly on the outside.    

Bugs, Beach & Bob's Big Boy

AH, THE SWEET reminiscent sound of my neighbor's teenage son's 1970's Volkswagen Bug rolling in at 2 am to bring back memories of my own sweet years as a curfew push'n girl. It is fantastic how a simple sound, smell or sight can immediately transport you back to a time remembered. The sound of the VW Bug takes me back to happy times of careless (but never reckless) abandon of a teenager. The smell of the beach takes me back to memories of bonfires, boogie boarding, football in the sand, first kisses, last kisses, barefoot walks along the water with rolled up Sergio Valente's, Hawaiian Tropic Suntan Oil - I sometimes now put it on my hands just to carry the smell with me throughout the day! As for a sight, I recall my last visit back to my hometown & seeing a Bob's Big Boy sticker & wow the memories that came rushing back. I was the oldest of six kids & on a modest middle-class income, our family rarely went out to eat at a restaurant. When we did, we knew it was a real treat & it was always to Bob's Big Boy. It had these really cool stainless steel tall ice cream cups & long ice cream spoons. I can still taste that chocolate milkshake today & hear that metal clanking down to the last spoonful. I can remember the restaurant layout...brown pleather waiting area benches & backless swivel counter stools, in front a super cool glass case which had super cool Bob's Big Boy comic books -fun times! I love that a simple sound, smell or sight can bring back such a rush of emotion. The smell of lavender makes me think of my son & his nightly baby baths followed by lavender baby lotion. The sound of "California Girls" makes me think of family roadtrips singing along with my dad to Beach Boys Greatest Hits. The sight of Chapstick "original" in the black tube brings back special memories of my grandpa (passed) who always had one in his pocket.  I can smell that distinct "original" smell even now! I hope my senses are always acute enough to be able to take a trip back in time every now & then.

Share with me what sounds, smells, sights transport you back to a favorite memory.

Pictured: 1970 Volkswagen Bug

Please Don't Stop the Music, Music Music...

I CAN'T GET the Rihanna song "Don't Stop the Music" out of my head & I don't even mind it being stuck there! Music simply is my soul's fuel. I cannot even imagine a day without music & frankly, my iPod changed my life by making it easier to get a "fill-up". I am grateful every day that I have a lifestyle that afforded me the opportunity to purchase an iPod (pricey at $300) & subsequently an iPhone (pricier still at $400) & both worth EVERY hard-earned cent! Not only do they provide great portability of a mass of tunes in a tiny pocket-sized wonder, a mini jukebox really, but they have taken accessibility to a whole new level. I was thrilled when in 1992 I was able to upgrade from a single CD stereo player to a 5 CD disc changer stereo. I thought, wow! Amazing! I will listen to so much more music now with the 5 CD option. Honestly, I rarely changed those 5 CD's & so there on the shelves sat 300 CD albums wanting desperately to be heard. When I purchased my iPod, I immediately downloaded all of my CD's (spent all Christmas vacation doing so) & then put the CD's away in sleeved binders for posterity - maybe they will be a collector's item someday. I now listen on my iPod through a growing list of over 7,000 songs, both ripped from my old CD's & newly acquired through iTunes & Amazon.com & this never would have been feasible on a CD player. I bow down to Apple (no, I'm not a Microsoft hater, but come on - Apple deserves props) for elevating music enjoyment to what could only have been imagined on an episode of the Jetsons 30 years ago. iPod, you sing me to sleep.  You're my alarm clock when time to wake.  You make my dreaded daily bus commute bearable & even now, at this very moment as I blog, you are in the background energizing me. You are ageless. You are a common language between me & my 16 year old stepson (we swap favs with each other) as well as my 7 year old son who is as obsessed with music as his mom. Forever a fan.

"I wanna take you away. Let's escape into
the music. DJ let it play. I just can't refuse it.
Like the way you do this. Keep on rockin' to it.
Please don't stop the, please don't stop the music".

The Road Not Taken

AS I REFLECT on my life it is clear that when I have taken the road less traveled, the road has usually been rockier, but undoubtedly has proven to be the most rewarding of the two. So why then do I not pick that road to begin with! Like Steven Covey says, "Begin with the end in mind". Knowing how rewarding the end will be, why do I still choose the more frequented path more often! As I venture out into singlehood again after choosing to end a 14 year marriage, I wonder how my life would have been had I only taken the road less traveled back then. At the ripe old age of 24, I felt I could conquer the world & thus nobody could tell me that I was making the biggest mistake of my life - well, they could have, but I wouldn't have listened. The adage, "Love is all that matters" (I'm laughing hysterically even writing that) how foolish a thought! Kiddos, hate to break it to you, but love is NOT enough...but that's a whole other post.  "Had I only"..."should have"..."If things had been"...all the things I have said over & over to make sense of the years I spent trodding down the wrong path...or was it? Perhaps it was the road I was supposed to take in order to arrive at the remarkable place I am at right now - to arrive back at the beginning with the chance to make a new choice. Dear Mr. Frost, I think your take has a loop-hole, an opportunity for a do-over, a Plan B. I am courageous, hopeful, observant, adventurous & do I dare say, happy & all this has come from my experiences on the frequented path of popular choice & only now am I again ready to take the road less traveled & the journey to here has made all the difference!

Click on the poem to read in full size.

Are We There Yet

I'M A FREAK for adventures &, like a dog & their bone, my tail-wag'n worthy bone is a roadtrip. Anytime, anyplace, anyone - well almost! People who smoke inside the car or hang their bare feet out the window, no go! An open highway, windows down, singing along to 80's music, always fashionable roof rack with more luggage than necessary & a small cooler with fruit that will get soggy before hour five - doesn't get much better than that! As early as age eight I remember roadtrip'n to visit family & friends. It is funny that, what to my parents seemed a most hideous & least desirable, but oh so necessary mode of transportation for a large family of eight on a middle class income, is MY preferred method of vacation transportation. Crazier still, this was all before iPods, DS's & portable DVD players. What DID six kids do to entertain ourselves through 15+ hour drives in a seatbeltless, faux wood-paneled station wagon & later in a green (think girl scout uniform) Travelall (nicknamed the Beast) with coordinating mommade green gingham curtains? Ahhhh sweet memories of...the license plate game that left us kids with bruised arms from punching points...the reminiscent sound of yet another semi-truck horn in relay to our pulling motion - though it may have been the twentieth time that HOUR, we still loved it as if it were the first...bottomless supply of cassette tapes (& even some 8 track tapes) since it was too painful to wait while one would rewind in order to listen to it again...mutiny against my dad in order to get bathroom relief...hostile takeovers from my mom for "sleep swerve close-call" number 82...hours of Mad Libs, Go Fish & those car books with the white pen/orange cap that would magically reveal the answers after rubbing the pen over a blank space. All this while six kids yelled out "ARE WE THERE YET" at least six times per hour (that would be once per kid, minimum). Love it! All of it! Crave it! Gotta have it! The blacktop is calling to me - ROADTRIP, ROADTRIP, ROADTRIP...

Pictured: Dylan Greco